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61: mutantpermullet: frustratingly little is known about this aberration.

62. fucked. (isn't this is the reason there's condoms and "sensual lube" in bathrooms across the midwest?)

63. turtlefacemullet (with guitar): this particular species of mullet never reaches puberty and thus has a child-like voice throughout his (her?) life-cycle.

the gender characteristics of male and female in this breed are switched, thus males grow abnormally large breasts (with afros on their nipples), and the females grow beards (with pimply undergrowth). the genitalia of the female also differs from a "normal" female in strange ways. in the place of the clitoris there protrudes an abnormally large, green turtle-head.

this causes problems, especially during adolescence. for instance, the females must place their green, slimy sack inside their undersized vagina when in gym class, and the males are forced to hide their breasts with either a guitar or tuba.

64. mullets n' tards: who could ask for anything more?

65. 2tonePermFeatherMullet: yet another rare breed captured by members of the mullitia. note how the strong, black mullet is blended seamlessly into the grey bangs to form a unique display of machismo and sensitivity. it is thought that through this technique, the mullet can expand it's breeding potential from whoever they can get drunk to a wide variety of females spanning ages 12-84.

not much else is known about this emerging new mutation of the ever-growing unique-haired populus.

we should respect and quietly observe these fascinating creatures (never taunting or laughing) and let them do their thing so we can document without disturbing with the hope to get a better understanding of them, as well as ourselves.

66. badtats: some choose to compliment their hair travesties with equally trajic tattoos.

researchers have found that "Taz" (not pictured) plays an integral, yet not fully understood role in the heirarchy of the mullet species.

67. fannyfudgepack...
by julie o.

...times two, like duran duran. there's poop in the sack. he does it because he was born to do it. his father was one of the wild men of borneo. back in the day, they built their fanny packs out of wood and dried cadavers. but now, for more comfort and durability, these fine satchelic transporters are fashioned out of vinyl and a deathstrap consisting something else, but i'm not so sure what that is, soldier. see, this man can't afford plumbing. he plugs his butthole with a turkey baster until tuesday afternoon. then he gets the sacks ready for his inviting, steamy sewage. he twists the sack around his back and loosens the strap so it is placed directly below his anus. then he lets it all go. he poops until he fills the first sack, then prepares for round two of this ceremonial tradition. then, upon filling the other sack, he must venture off into the forest, the wetlands, or wherever his turds direct him. people stare. of course, people stare. but he don't care. the smell is putrid, yet strangely arousing to other campers who might be in the vicinity. especially bears. if he were to take the sacks off, he would have to hang them from a tree so the bears wouldn't get to them. well, then he takes out each of his turds one by one, gives each specimen a firm handshake and sends them out into the world, to perform their magic. he kisses each one on the head, and rubs it around the rim of his left nipple, then bids them farewell, to be whiksed away by the effervescent, flowing currents of the big river. he is proud, his family is on their own, going out into the world to make something of themselves. while he continues his duty as role model and loving father of all things fannypack and turdlike.

68: midgiemullhawk: now i can die a hapy man.

69. dreadgothmullet: by popular demand i've posted the dreadmullet. this particular dreadmullet looks as if a lot of time, planning, and research was involved in the formation of this pristine specimen.

he wears black on the outside, because that's how he feels on the inside.

70: that...guy:

you smile at him.

you say, "hello."

you might even buy him a drink.

or two.

but,

and let's be honest here,

did you kiss him?